I will be blogging from the safety of the underside of my desk until the “all clear” siren sounds and we are no longer in danger of getting clobbered by space junk.
As I sit here munching my emergency stash of Dr. Pepper and Teddy Grahams, I have given pause to wonder what would be worse than being pounded into pink paste by NASA garbage, and I think I may have found something: being in a movie released in the Fall. Much like decommissioned satellites, Hollywood lets it’s junk drop with a resounding thud after the Summer movie-viewing season is over, and some film greats are slumming, big time.
Opening this weekend is Dolphin Tale, a tale about… well, you get the idea. This practically-made-for-the Hallmark-channel film has Morgan Freeman in a co-starring role. Yes, Freeman loses top billing to a sea creature. One suspects he was hired just so he could narrate the trailer
Also opening is Abduction, a supposed thriller starring Taylor Lautner, the non-shiny fella of the Twilight series that spends most of his screen time with his shirt off and looking like he was just hit upside the head with an axe handle. The trailers feature Sigourney Weaver taking a trip to paycheckville and lots of quick cuts to keep Lautner’s line readings from sinking in. I will spare you a link. Anything you imagine will be far better than what you would actually see.
Oh, how the mighty have fallen, a phrase I invoke to bring my “falling garbage” theme full circle. I think I like it better down here anyway. Towerbot – can you help me scoot this thing closer to the bathroom?